When we hear about or come face to face with another's suffering, especially someone close to us, often our first emotional reaction is one of sadness, overwhelm, anxiety or even powerlessness. Our heart's response is one of compassion as we feel another's suffering as if it were our own.
Common statements I often hear are, "Oh, I feel so bad for her...", or "I'm so worried/concerned about him...", or "I feel so sorry for her...". And, at first, that IS how we are feeling.
What we don't realize is that the energy from thoughts such as those, is now emanating/radiating out from us towards the person we are focused upon! THAT is not helpful to them!
Not only that, but by continuing to dwell on those negative emotions, we now form our own personal point of attraction, and begin drawing into our experience (Law of Attraction) more things to feel badly about, concerned about, or worried about!
We have been trained to believe that "commiserating" (co-misery) is kind and compassionate. We have a habit of playing the game, "ain't it awful", joining others in a litany of all the things that are going wrong, might go wrong, or have gone wrong in the past! We spend a great deal of time talking, blogging, emailing about "what is"...and forget that we are magnificent deliberate creators with Source-level powers of imagination and visualization and intention.
Unfortunately, we have come to believe that these negative kinds of responses are inevitable...and they may well be...for a moment! Of course, we feel badly when things aren't going well for a loved one. And depending on circumstances, we may not know what we can actually do to help...to soothe...to comfort. We are, by nature, very action-oriented beings! We have, afterall, come here to create, to manifest, to DO!
But, let me remind you that you are not a "human DOING"...you are a human BEING!
You are a magnificent vibrational Being who creates with the power of THOUGHT!
Your "being-ness" (state of being) precedes and determines all of your doings!
"Vibrational Reality" precedes all manifested reality!
Energy (ideas, thoughts, beliefs) precedes all form! First, we have an idea or a thought, then we think more about those thoughts, and eventually those thoughts become what we call physical reality!
This is why it is much easier when we allow ourselves to be inspired into action, rather than motivated. When we are inspired, we are aligned with Spirit, our Inner Being, we are allowing all the Love and Power of the Universive to pour into us and we are being moved from within to effortless action. When we are tuned in, turned on, excited about what it is we want to do, our doing becomes so much easier...we are "in the flow"!
So, rather than wrapping negative energy (thoughts and feelings) around yourself or your loved one, practice taking the time to first, find better-feeling thoughts and begin to close the gap between the physical aspect of yourself (human) and your larger Non-physical Self (Your Spirit, Soul, Inner Being). Reach for the perspective of Source-level Energy. You are seeking a way to look at your loved one that matches the way Source is looking at him or her. You are wanting to align yourself with that eternal Stream of Well-Being and Abundance and Love which is flowing into each and every one of us, all day, every day!
We are, by our very nature, uplifters, helpers, and problem-solvers. And we certainly don't like the suffering and apparent tragedies or even just the hard times that seem to befall our friends, family members, and loved ones. THAT is NOT WHAT WE WANT! And so, from these contrasting experiences, we really do become crystal clear about WHAT WE DO WANT! If someone we know is sick, we want WELLNESS for them! If someone we know has a problem, we want SOLUTIONS for them! If a loved one doesn't have enough money, or food, or shelter, we want ABUNDANCE in all these things...for them...for everyone!
So, the next time you hear about the misfortune of another, see if you can't pause and remember that you are a magnificent vibrational being and bask in the knowing that the energy of your positive, hopeful, good-feeling thoughts is a powerful way to help another...
Practice shifting your focus away from their misfortune and visualize, imagine, think about, focus upon what it is you want for them...see them as healthy and happy, open to the flow of love and well-being and abundance...
Imagine the positive energy of those loving, empowering, hopeful, encouraging thoughts enveloping your loved one or friend and a soft smile appearing on their face, as they feel the love and well-being pouring into them.
Focus on the positive aspects of your loved one, seeing them as strong and clear-minded, passionately desiring well-being, abundance or a solution to their problem. Focus on their past successes or see them healthy and happy in the future. Find positive aspects of their predicament. Focus on what is working, instead of what isn't. Find things to appreciate! And then, from that state of being aligned with your Non-physical Self, encourage your loved ones to do the same!
As you stay determined to look for things that make you feel good, and encourage your friend or loved one to do the same, you are truly helping them! You are tending to your own vibration by keeping your own light shining brightly and steadily, so that the energy emanating from you is positive, empowering, uplifting and inspiring.
Remember, Source never joins us in our worried, concerned, negative states of being! Source is forever calling us Home to our natural state of being as unconditionally loving, joyous, powerful creators!
As you hold your loved one as the object of your positive attention, the Stream of Well-being and Abundance in All Things is flowing into you and radiating from you, and they will benefit from your very presence and your loving gaze. Rather than being part of or adding to the problem, you are now truly a conduit for the solution!
Blessings of Well-being and Abundance,